Updated: Sep 23, 2020

We give up our power to whoever and whatever we hate.

Forgiveness means we accept our life’s unique teachings and the sacred learning each experience presents. These teachings and learning give us power and strength beyond comprehension. In a very real sense, our willingness to forgive reflects the quality and depth of our connection to our spirituality and the Higher Power. “Forgiveness is for you, not the person you are forgiving “

When a hurricane or earthquake hits a town, one cannot ignore or minimise the destruction the disaster has caused. However, although the town is in ruins, you still have to live in it. And no amount of anger or any other negative emotions is going to reconstruct that city. It is the realisation that as unfair as the disastrous event was, life must move on. The living carries on regardless.

The problem with anger and harbouring anger, is that anger does not grasp that the past is over, and that the harm has been done. It is the fuel for justification of your pursuit of justice and vengeance.

“You will not be punished for your anger; you will be punished by your anger.”

Buddhist Expression

The past cannot change, no matter how many times you replay the scene in the theatre of your mind. Forgiveness allows you to accept that the past has happened and there cannot be a different past. It is accepting that that the past is over, and the devastation left in its wake can never be rebuilt. It is accepting that the rebuilding of yourself must be started by yourself and there is no magic wand that is going to make things easy or make it go away.

Does forgiveness mean that must have a relationship with the person that hurt you or justify and excuse whatever they have done to you? No, it is to the contrary. It means that by you deciding to forgive, you have decided to move ahead and take control of your future life. It means that you have decided to heal your own wounds and you have accepted to live with the scars that the once painful wounds have left on you.

Forgiveness is a bold statement to say that you are no longer waiting for an apology for you to take control of your life and create a new future and destiny for yourself. It a statement saying “I am in control and I am taking my control back. I am going to walk bravely into the future with every scar to remind me that whatever has happened to me is not going to define me.”

“True forgiveness is when you can say, “Thank you for that experience.” ― Oprah Winfrey